Friday, October 2, 2015

Mother of Tears, Deadly Blessing, Cooties, From Dusk Till Dawn and Deep Rising

October Horror Movie Challenge Day 2

Mother of Tears (2007)

Why I Watched:
Udo Kier
Sergio Stivaletti
Witchcraft / Satanic / Religious
Released in the 2000s

What I Learned:
  • Wow, this gets violently disgusting fast.
  • Random bare ass. Surprise.
  • In a horror movie, if you're ever told your parents died in a car crash when you were little, it's a lie. Always.
  • Being a priest is a really dangerous career choice.
  • Random monkey strolling around, cloaks that cover everything except the boobs, and vaginal impalement. So, yeah.


Deadly Blessing (1981)

Why I Watched:
James Horner
Wes Craven
Distributed by Arrow Video
Ghost / Haunting
Slasher / Psycho / Homicidal Maniac

What I Learned:
  • When you feel bad for the Peeping Tom, things are getting weird.
  • Oh, hey, horse and buggies. I seem to have stumbled into the little known Amish horror genre
  • Kids, stay away from the woman in shorts. She's the devil. Didn't you see her shorts? Those are devil woman shorts.
  • When Ernest Borgnine calls you a serpent, you best recognize. Mermaid Man ain't screwing around with likes of you.
  •  Young woman in a tub in a horror movie = legs spread wide. Always. Who bathes like that?
  •  "Go to thy whore" Um thanks, dad.
  •  Attack chickens. That was unexpected.


Cooties (2014)

Why I Watched:

What I Learned:
  • What is with my viewings today and chickens. Ick. 
  • Kids are bastards
  • "Oh look, carnage" 
  • "Follow me, I do Crossfit" This movie is so perfectly quotable.
  • Perhaps hiding in a Chuck E Cheese-like establishment isn't the best choice in a town full of zombie children.

From Dusk Till Dawn (1996)

Why I Watched:
Released in the 1990s

What I Learned:
  • I didn't appreciate how closely the show followed the beginning of the movie. Wow, nice.
  • You're driving an RV. Why are you even going to a motel?
  • Since when do hotels have twin beds? Was that a thing?
  • Hard to believe this came out almost 20 years ago, until you see how young Danny Trejo looks.
  • Sex Machine is a very complex character. Seriously.
  • If you interrupt a minister praying, he'll shoot you in the face. Good to know. 
  • The often under-appreciated disco ball of death
  • That very last scene, perfect.


Deep Rising (1998)

Why I Watched:
Jerry Goldsmith
Monster / Creature Feature / Godzilla
 Nation of Origin: Canada
Takes Place on or Under the Sea

What I Learned:
  • Being attacked from inside the toilet. Everyone's worst nightmare.
  • "You're not the boss of me." Doesn't work for toddlers, definitely doesn't work for grown ass men.
  • I like Treat Williams. I like Famke Janssen. But, god help me, I don't care about this movie at all.
  • Why isn't this over yet? What could they possibly need another half hour for? They've already killed me with boredom. 

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